The Dr Susan Block Show
Episodes
Tuesday May 04, 2021
Tuesday May 04, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
It’s a trifecta of fiestas: May Day, International Workers Day, and the first sacred self-loving day of Masturbation Month 2021. Brothers and Sisters, Wankers and Monkey-Spankers, Workers of the World—and that includes Sex Workers—Unite! Smash your chains (unless you’re into bondage)! Break out the Maypoles, Hitachi Magic Wands, Communist Manifestos and lube! It’s also almost Cinco de Mayo, so break out the salsa (just don’t confuse the lube with the salsa)! Feliz Masturbación de Mayo!
And take this bonoboësque, sapiosexual, party ride on the Love Train, as we pick up “Most Well-Rounded Kinkster” SUZY award-winning MFA, MILF and “hot art teacher,” Rhiannon Aarons (who recalls our threesome with me and a big phallic green gourd named Gourdy), and more, telling tales of first-time masturbation experiences along with our most recent which, in some cases, happened just before the show!
Origin Storytelling begins with May Day, rising up from the prehistoric Floralia like a joyously erect Maypole. International Workers' Day, the ultimate F*ck Da Rich Fest, declared in 1889 by the Socialist/Communist Second International, commemorates Chicago’s “Haymarket” workers’ revolt. A century later, Masturbation Month was proclaimed by my late great mentor Dr. Betty Dodson and Good Vibrations, honoring U.S. Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders, fired for saying public school sex education could teach that masturbation is a good safer sex option. If only President Bill Clinton had listened to Dr. J’s advice… See why self-pleasure is so important—not just for you—but for the world? So, go bonobos (yes, bonobos do it too), and give yourself a hand. You Do You. Celebrate the month of May…
Slight tangent: California Governor Gavin Newsom’s ill-advised French Laundry dinner is kind of like Clinton’s bad-judgment BJ. Newsom should have dined at home, and Clinton should have masturbated alone. Still, that was no reason for Clinton to be impeached, nor for Newsom to be recalled!
Our sizzling post-show throwback features sexy Savannah Fyre (now Alana Cruise) kicking off “Masturbation Month 2016” with a bang and a sparkling Spring squirt. I also present the 8 Great Virtues of Masturbation. Virtues? Yes, indeed, denigrated as “self-abuse” for centuries, now we are calling it what it is: self-pleasure. It feels good. And it is good. But what is it good for? Listen and learn…
Wankers of the World Unite! Want more? Watch what we can’t show you here and read the Journal: https://drsusanblock .com/fdr-masturbation-month-mayday
Need a Hand…. Or just need to talk PRIVATELY about something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/guided-masturbation
Wednesday Apr 28, 2021
Wednesday Apr 28, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
Deadly ammosexual shootings—from both police and civilians—continue to shatter America, but it’s almost Masturbation Month, so just shoot the gun between your legs! Seriously, You DO You. So much safer and more fun for all!
Need inspiration? Hop aboard another bonoboësque joy ride on the Love Train as we celebrate “guilty” verdicts for that sadistic murderer with a *jealous cuck* knee. Unfortunately, Chauvin’s unchecked sadism isn’t rare in America’s racist, ruthless policing system, where a police academy instructor can tell cadets that a “perk” of being a cop is that after killing a “bad guy,” you’re likely to have “the best sex” ever. As a #sexologist, I’m all for folks using quirky things as aphrodisiacs—but not killing someone!
We also talk about Montana Governor Greg Gianforte’s pro-Kill bill; U.S. out of Afghanistan (Masturbation Not Occupation!); Armenian Genocide survivor and fellow Bohemian Yalie, Col. Jirayr Zorthian, and the Dance of Zorbacchus; NYC DA Cyrus Vance, Jr. (another Eli) will no longer prosecute sex workers… sort of (thanks for the tip, Veronica Monet); Caitlin Jenner’s Cali Governor candidacy explodes like a “gender reveal” party bomb; more fun details in the ongoing story of the LAPD's unwarranted "raid" on the Speakeasy (in 2001) for which we won a settlement; the "Orgasmic Meditation" (OM) situation at "One Taste"; The Supremes to hear arguments about the “F” word (F*ck Censorship!); and more!
And we get ready for the Merry Masturbation Month of May 2021 with our sensational sapiosexual post-show throwback, “Collegiate Masturbation Month 2017,” featuring UCLA Satyr Magazine Editor-in-Chief Sarah Crosthwaite, Satyr writers Rachael Frank and George Gutten, “Most Bonobo” Suzy Award-winning porn star Riley Reyes—who gives a special M Month Hitachi Magic Wand demo—plus Riley’s GF Amelia Jones—who also happens to be a sophomore at UCLA (Go Bruins!), Suzy Award-winning “Most Bonobo Couple” Danièle Watts & Rawkstar Chef Be*Live, trump surrogate Cali Cuck (whom we spank for having the worst First 100 Days ever), Aaliyah Corsets, Ikkor the Wolf and my beautiful assistant Gypsy Bonobo. Listen to the Classical Greek Self-Pleasure Origin Story.
Watch what we can’t show you here and read the Journal: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-wank-dont-shoot
Need to talk PRIVATELY about something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/guided-masturbation
Wednesday Apr 21, 2021
Wednesday Apr 21, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
Happy 4/20 Honey! Just in time (we really need that weed)! Well, t least killer cop Derek Chauvin was convicted (woohoo!), but America is still one big 3.8 million-square-mile shooting range masquerading as a country. From cops to crazy people (with lots of crazy ammosexual cops), Americans are shooting to kill their fellow Americans… like crazy! So... ditch that madness & hop aboard the F.D.R. Love Train! No tickets required & you’re free to get high. Just shoot the gun between your legs—peacefully, consensually & maybe with a nice squirt. It’s The Bonobo Way of peace through pleasure, not the Ugly American Way of death through murder.
We toke as we talk about “killer cops” like cold-blooded Chauvin and Kim Potter (“Karen” with a badge), taking your illuminating "police story" calls & comments. We also tell the touching tale of the “Church-Based Cuckoldry Gone Wrong” Pastor’s daughter bravely “breaking the cycle” of violence and hypocrisy, reaching out to us with great courage and generosity of spirit.
Things can get crazy, but sometimes you can wash *it* all away with a nice “Spring Shower,” the name of our post-F.D.R. #DrSuzy-Tv show featuring that first multi-squirting 2011 appearance of Texas MILF & Female Ejaculation Queen Deauxma, whose Holy Water literally hits the ceiling (and I mean the 18-foot rafters of our Downtown Speakeasy)! I also describe how I recently helped another famous porn star to squirt for the first time through erotic hypnosis, and how maybe you (or your partner) can squirt too!
And we celebrate 4/20 Honey (don’t we always), so light up as you listen in. Boom Shiva Shambalai Boom! Decriminalizing the sacred weed is something else (besides the Chauvin verdict) America can be proud of.
Want more? Read the journal and watch that wild Spring Showers show we can't show on Youtube: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-cops-squirt-420
Need to talk PRIVATELY about something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/squirting-world
Wednesday Apr 14, 2021
Wednesday Apr 14, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
If your orgasms are real and your diamonds are fake, your marriage will be great! That’s just one of the love life lessons of Capt’n Max’s and My 29th Wedding Anniversary show. All Aboard the F.D.R. Love Train, celebrating 29 years of lawfully married love, lust, trust, romance, revolution, hot sex, antiwar, ethical hedonism and the Bonobo Way of peace through pleasure, as we honor the kinkiest kind of human bondage there is: marriage.
We take it slow, savoring the scenery and good vibrations, as we reminisce and interact with “Happy Anniversary!” well-wishers on our various live platforms. “Most Bonobo Couple” SUZY award-winners Danièle Watts and Rawkstar Chef Be*Live call in from a parked car (while sexting us naked selfies!) for a “synchro-mystical” conversation on married sex; grooming among humans and other mammals (sadly, the word is now getting a bad rap due to its current usage as a term for beginning sexual abuse); their first time on The Dr. Susan Block Show at our wild orgiastic 24th Wedding Anniversary Bacchanal; their friend, Freckle, “making” Danièle read Being a Woman (the book I co-authored with the late Dr. Toni Grant); roleplaying a French maid in Django Unchained and rejecting foot fetishizing filmmaker Quentin Tarantino’s invitation to make out; the erotic mysteries of faux cannibalism (#EattheRich!), though Armie Hammer would taste more like baking soda than wedding cake.
It being our anniversary, I dress up in patterned fishnet stockings in solidarity with Dr. Jill Biden—whom the Rightwing ridiculously tried to slut-shame for her hosiery.
This is a 90% fun show, but we take on a few seriously harrowing subjects from raging ammosexual cuckolds to handling sexual assault. As always, we inject humor into the harrowing parts, so if you’re overly sensitive, go listen to Joe Rogaine. The only time we don’t joke is when we talk (briefly) about the Derek Chauvin trial: That onlooker saying, “You’re enjoying that!” just underlines George Floyd’s murder as an obvious case of sadistic policing. Will the verdict reflect the obvious? We’ll see…
Besides our marvelous marriage, we recall our pre-marital days, from Max’s gallery of European cougars to what I call “My Swinging Life,” soon to be a docu-series, like My 600-lb Life—but with eating pussy instead of pizza. Oh, here we go back to faux cannibalism again.
Sex scandal is all the rage, but consensual sexual expression is vital to our “mental health.” Everyone from Prince Harry to Gwyneth Paltrow is trying to improve our “mental health” these days, but how many are directly addressing the kinky parts of our well-being? That’s what we try to do on this show, and that’s what we’ve tried to do in our marriage for the past 29 years. So, relax, turn the lights down low to a nice wedding night glow and listen to this sapiosexual show…
Want more? Read the journal and watch that wild 24th Wedding Anniversary Bacchanal we can't show on Youtube: https://drsusanblock .com/29th-wedding-anniversary.
Need to talk PRIVATELY about something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/phone-sex-therapy.
Tuesday Apr 06, 2021
Tuesday Apr 06, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
It’s Easter Eve as our Love Train leaves the station, so we crack open an Easter egg of revelations regarding “The Resurrection” of Jesus, Persephone, Osiris, Dionysus/Bacchus, Spring and you. Yes, YOU. Want to resurrect your erection—or just your general lust for life… and the afterlife? Listen
Springing from the glories of Gospel heaven to the depths of Christian hell, we tell the cautionary tale of Oklahoma Pastor David Evans’ cuckold “love triangle” that started in a Super 8 Motel and ended in a murder with the victim’s own gun. If you’re interested in cuckolding, listen up and learn what NOT to do! As this tragic killing, the Massage Parlor Massacre and so many others demonstrate, we need gun control—for police as well as civilians. Nevertheless, a murder weapon can be just a knee on the neck of a handcuffed prisoner struggling to breathe, as evidenced by the sadistic policing that took George Floyd’s life, now on display in the harrowing trial of Derek Chauvin. For comic relief, we have Gaetz-Gate, wherein Far-Right Buffoon Matt Gaetz tries to drag fellow Far-Right Buffoon Tucker Carlson into his own sleazy circus of sex scandal. We love to see one of Drumpf’s favorite and most obnoxious punks take a pratfall for any reason, though we’re not judging his sexual behavior until more facts emerge. When a Cuomosexual listener wants us to weigh in on the New York Governor’s scandals, all we can say is he must be thanking Jesus this Easter for the heavenly distraction of Gaetz-gate.
In light of the most recent “gender reveal” tragedy, Capt’n Max, Unscene Abe, Mariah and I deplore the multi-tiered stupidities of gender reveal parties, from jinxing your future child’s sexuality to setting your neighborhood on fire. We then take a slight detour into movie-reviewing two new “buddy films,” one being our friend and “Funniest Fundamentalist Refugee” Suzy Award winner Luzer Twersky’s star turn in the soon-to-be-released “No Name Restaurant” (about an Orthodox Jew and Bedouin’s unlikely friendship forged in the desert), and the other being Eric Andre’s Candid-Camera-ish “Bad Trip” (the Chinese finger trap scene reminds me of male bonobos resolving conflict through “penis fencing”). How are “buddy films” like these, focused on male-male bonding as opposed to male-female relationships, connected with Jesus and all those male-bonding Apostles? Was/Is Jesus bi? Aren’t we all… at least somewhat?
It’s just sexo-theological speculation; all I know for sure is that I love my Jesus Jackhammer dildo, one of the stars of our post-show bacchanal, “Easter Eve DTEASE Res-Erection on DrSuzy.Tv,” which also features Unlicensed Professionals Cat Imperio (the “Anal Artist”) and Samantha Fairley, Dayton Rains, sexy trans pornstar Chelsea Marie and amazing glam-punk sex-rock band The DTease (don’t miss it)! We also gear up for next week’s 29th wedding anniversary ride on the Love Train and, speaking of railroad romance, we’re excited for Biden’s plan to pump billions into public transportation infrastructure—including trains. Woo hoo and choo-choo! Yo Joe, we know you’ve got an Amtrak fetish, but how about throwing a bit of those billions to the F.D.R. Love Train?
Want more? Can’t get enough of that Easter Eve stuff? Want to watch the Bacchanalian videos we can't show on Youtube? Crave more deets on the Christian Cuckold Murder? Read: Read more and watch the hot videos: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-easter-cuckold
Need to talk PRIVATELY about Cuckolding, Religious Sexual Abuse or something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/cuckold or https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/phone-sex-therapy
Tuesday Mar 30, 2021
Tuesday Mar 30, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
Why are so many of us violent and confused? Why don’t we follow The Bonobo Way of peace through pleasure? Why do we stay shackled like the Hebrew slaves in Egypt to this Pyramid Scheme we call "capitalism"? One root of the evil that runs deep in the history of human “civilization” is religious sexual abuse—from the Evangelical “purity” cult-complicit “Massage Parlor Massacre” to the first little “baby lie” told to me at the age of five, in the center of a big 100-family Passover seder.
Usually, I celebrate the “Pesach” with a kinky seder and scallion-flogging orgy, but we’re still in the midst of crossing the “Red Sea” of the Coronapocalypse, and nothing is “as usual.” Though our erotic, exotic and very kinky “Sexy Seder” 2016 is our post-show throwback for another stimulating ride on F.D.R., featuring Capt’n Max, Mariah, Unscene Abe and I talking about freedom, restraint and religious abuse; ammosexual overkill (literally); despicable anti-Asian thuggery; scams (April Fool’s! We have your nudes!): that hot Lil Nas X lap dance with Satan in “Call Me By Your Name”; Charlton Heston as Moses parting that Red Sea; racist sexist Georgia juxtapositions; #GoBonobos for Baltimore State Attorney Marilyn Mosby for defacto decriminalizing sex work and drug use; why we need to F*ck Da Rich with a nice BiG “wealth tax,” plus more sapiosexual insights and eargasms for all…
And yes, I tell a few sexy, funny Passover tales, including the true story of Elijah and the little lie of the (not really) missing Manischewitz that evolved into the Big Lie of religious abuse that turned Me into an authority-questioning sexologist specializing in working with victims of religious abuse.
Read more and watch the hot videos: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-passover
Need to talk PRIVATELY about Religious Sexual Abuse or something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497.
For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/religious-abuse or https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/phone-sex-therapy. You won’t go to Hell for it. But you just might feel a lot better.
Wednesday Mar 24, 2021
Wednesday Mar 24, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
It’s our 13th ride on the F.D.R. Love Train, now roaring through a Tunnel of Darkness as we react, mourn, explore and analyze the horrific mass murder of eight people in the “Spa Shootings” that started in the little village of Acworth, Georgia and spread through Atlanta. Was it a “Hate Crime” against sex workers as well as Asian-American women? What is “sex addiction,” and why did the self-confessed mass murderer, Robert Aaron Long, use that long-debunked term to explain what Captain Jay Baker of the Cherokee County Sheriff’s Office so infuriatingly called a “really bad day for him”? Who are the victims who actually HAD a “really bad day,” and how can we honor their loss with love?
Xiaojie Tan, Hyun Jung Grant, Daoyou Feng, Soon Chung Park, Suncha Kim, Yong Ae Yue, Delaina Ashley Yaun, Paul Andre Michels are the names of the dead. Elcias Hernandez-Ortiz was critically injured.
The Georgia Massage Parlor Massacre appears to have been a terrible *perfect storm* of three converging toxic factors: 1) Religious sexual abuse; in this case, a devoutly Evangelical, erotophobic cult of “purity” fostered by the killer’s family, church (Crabapple First Baptist) and treatment centers (HopeQuest and Maverick) operating almost like a terrorist “cell,” 2) The Sex Addictionology racket; “sex addiction” being a bogus diagnosis (not accepted in the DSM-5), yet an extremely popular accusation AND excuse for unconventional or just bad behavior, as well as the Religious Right’s current term of shame for old-time “sin”; and 3) Guns; easy availability (no waiting period) and, while most erotic activities and even sexual thoughts are denigrated, a “fetish” for firearms is elevated, thereby creating a lethal “ammosexual” desire to fire phallic weaponry, instead of just “shooting” the “gun” between your legs safely and consensually.
We also discuss the Armie Hammer “cannibalism” story’s development into a full-on LAPD rape investigation; Biden’s threatening war of “killer” claims with Putin; how proud we are that America is finally #1 in the world regarding something good (vaccinations!), but that we still need to mask up (and make it sexy!). We also talk with Elvis tribute artist Smokey Binion, Jr. (calling in from a small Texas panhandle town that’s almost as Christian-conservative a community as Acworth) who longs to “shake a leg” (which leg?) in Bonoboville, and we enjoy a few eargasms and jokes (laughter is a mental orgasm).
But our focus is primarily on the tragic and appalling Massage Parlor Massacre, and the best antidote to the mounting madness is following the Bonobo Way of sex-positivity, female empowerment, male well-being and peace through pleasure. That’s not artificial consumerist pleasure, but real organic healing pleasure.
Post-show, we play a very relevant 2012 throwback, “From ‘The Myth of Sex Addiction’ to a Sex Addict Orgy,” featuring The Myth of Sex Addiction author Dr. David Ley. We also thank some of our comrades, including Goddess Soma Snakeoil, Veronica Monet and the wonderful folks at DomCon and Sanctuary, for their uplifting activism in sex work and the sex-positive community during these troubled times. Let’s decriminalize and destigmatize consenting adult sex work now!
Read more: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-massage-massacre
For more on Weapons of Masked Seduction, go to: https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/sexymasks
Need to talk PRIVATELY about Religious Sexual Abuse or something you can’t talk about anywhere else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497. For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/religious-abuse or https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/phone-sex-therapy. You won’t go to Hell for it. But you just might feel a lot better.
Wednesday Mar 17, 2021
Wednesday Mar 17, 2021
Warning: Explicit Conversations About Politics, Culture, & Sexuality
That light at the end of the tunnel doesn’t mean we’re out of the darkness, so mask up—not *just* because masks protect you and others, but also because masks are sexy!
Slip into your Weapons of MASKED Seduction and hop aboard the St. Paddy’s F.D.R. Love Train as we choo-choo through the Tunnel of Love… Of course, not everyone wants to mask up—like our old comrade, porn star, “meat puppet” and “Covid refugee,” Hamilton Steele, who calls in to praise French swing clubs and complain about facemasks.
Well, at least, he’s got a nice big shillelagh, which segues into our “St. Paddy’s Day, the Bonobo Way with GasMASKgirl” after-show. When I mention that leprechauns, who nonconsensually pinch people not wearing green, might be accused of sexual harassment (if they were real), our platforms light up with leprechaun stans afraid “cancel culture” will “cancel” the little green troll faeries.
We also weigh in on Dr. Seuss, the latest Cuomosexual scandals and bogus Milosexual gay “conversion therapy,” and I ask Capt’n Max, aka Prince Maximillian Rudolph Leblovic di Lobkowicz di Filangieri, a senior member of two different royal families—the Filangieris and the Lobkowiczes—how he felt watching the very public British Royal Family quarrel, the latest episode of the ongoing soap opera having been deftly produced by Queen Oprah, whom we met when she was just another Duchess of Daytime TV. And wow, does he—and do we—have a lot to say about their Royal Hineys—I mean, Royal Highnesses. And then there’s the BS about Saudi Prince MBS, praise for Max’s favorite royal, Mad King Ludwig, sympathy for Major Biden, and Irish Kisses throughout another trippy trip through the Tunnel of Love.
Want more? Go to: https://drsusanblock.com/fdr-comrades
For more on Weapons of Masked Seduction, go to: https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/sexy-masks
Need to talk PRIVATELY about something you can’t talk about with anyone else? You can talk with us… Call the Therapists Without Borders of the Dr. Susan Block Institute anytime: 213.291.9497. For more information, visit https://drsusanblockinstitute.com/phone-sex-therapy. We’re here for YOU.